Responsibility

Responsibility rests heavily on my shoulders where my extended family is concerned. That being my parents and my siblings. Being the eldest, being the only one with a stable job, being the only sane sibling (I think!), being the only one that they can ridiculously and shamelessly ask for anything from. ANYTHING! They know that I love them so much I will ultimately back down and give it to them. I guess this is the reason why I was chosen by GOD to be in this position. To have something to give. To have the wisdom to understand family dynamics ... whatever that means :)

Today, my brother struck a motorcycle while driving to work and the driver needs operation. This is the kind of emergency I wanted to save up for. I know they have no one else to depend on but me. I always hear "God will provide". I also hear "God helps those who help themselves." Am I helping my family too much that they do not work hard anymore to deserve the help from God? *Sigh* I sometimes think I am just rationalizing my thoughts on NOT helping anymore. But like I said, I will back down ... Help will be on its way.

Cold Days and Nights

Since December, I have not been going out to the malls or to the movies or dining out. So from the office, I go straight home. I am not complaining because it is still cold outside and by staying in, I save a lot. I made this list of what I do or know or have, now that I stay-in all nights of the week and all weekends:

1. I still sleep late (2am) and wake up early (7am).
2. I read a lot of stuff from the internet. The Olympics, the issues on foreign teacher recruiting, news from the Philippines.
3. On the Olympics, I believe that Lindsey Jacobellis showboated and did a fancy move when she saw she was way ahead to make the gold medal for the snowboarding event. It cost her the gold. And she said she wanted to change the "punk" image of snowboarders? Now tell that to the Marines! I adore the humility of Seth Wescott (snowboarder) and quiet regality of Michelle Kwan. I took a quiz on the Torino Olympics site and I aced it! That tells you how glued I am to TV and the internet.
4. Foreign teacher recruiting has been receiving a lot of flak from teacher unions and self-righteous reporters. They say that they are saddened that US public schools are hiring foreign teachers whose primary goals are just to earn dollars. And Americans do not have that same mind-set? The reason why the public schools are having a difficult time filling up their teacher vacancies is because teacher's salaries are not attractive by American standards. Hence, very few Americans make teaching their career.

5. I suddenly miss scriptwriting. I started a storyline and finished it in a flash! It is a love story of course :) I am starting to wonder if I can have a novel published. Hmmmm ....

So who says housewives just watch trashy talk shows and soaps?

Shifting ...

Have you ever felt like you were standing on loose sand and it is giving way under you and you thought you already sunk so so low that you are ready to draw your last breath? This is one of those days.